I am Running Out of Things to Waste Time On

I have spent a lot of time on displacement activities. This has added to my low mood as I have not achieved things I should. But I am now running out of such tasks.

Mood Swings and Taking Advice on Gentle Exercise

Over the last few days I have been taking my own advice of making sure I get out of the house for frequent gentle exercise in the form of a brisk walk and social contact. It has been a busy few days where my mood had been mainly good but with some disconcertingly sharp and uncomfortable mood swings.

Depression as Intellectual Curiosity, Challenge and Exercise in Problem Solving

I have a huge thirst for knowledge and there is little that does not interest me. On good days, like today, I can see my depression as an opportunity to use many of my talents.

Understanding Depression

For example there is my intellectual curiosity that wants to understand depression,what is happening to me and how I can deal with my condition. I want to know why some people seem more prone to it and whether anyone can become clinically depressed if specific triggers exist.

Depression Closes the Gap Between Light and Dark Moods.

A weekend that was essentially productive demonstrates the narrow divide between being OK and in a dark place. I experienced both this last weekend.

Over the weekend I achieved quite a bit. I got a book review written and published on Suite101 and another sketched out for my own Solidus site. Alison and I got several jobs done in the garden and I caught up on some administration that I had been avoiding. So all in all a useful weekend and much of the time I deservedly felt pretty good and relaxed. But...

First Step of Cure for Depression is Recognising the Problem

The first step in dealing with any type of problem is recognising that there is a problem at all and then identifying the nature of that problem. I now realise I have been depressed to some extent for several years; possibly since my mother died and when, for some reason, I did not go through the usual grieving process. With hindsight I do recognise much earlier bouts of what I now understand as depression.

For the last few years it has made work difficult and stressful which has exacerbated the condition. My depression was finally brought to a head with my father's death. For a while my depression became much more severe and I came close to breaking down completely. Fortunately as I went through the normal grieving process associated with bereavement I started to come out of that acute phase.